Madonna may be on the cusp of 50, but she still enjoys playing games with the press. Paparazzi caught up with the Big M this week as she left the posh Claridges restaurant in London with two accessories: husband Guy Ritchie, who was celebrating his 39th birthday, and a sex toy known as the Purple Penetrat ... well, you get the idea.

The Daily Mail posits that the plaything, which a smiling Madonna carried in a see-through bag despite the crush of cameras, may have been her gag gift for Guy. No word on whether he found the offering funny ha-ha or funny nuh-uh.

Perhaps the pair was just cutting loose after successfully making it through their home visit last week with a Malawian adoption official, who reportedly gave them the thumbs up to adopt -- officially -- 2-year-old cutie-pie David Banda.

"It went like clockwork," a "source close to the singer" tells the paper. "When he arrived, Madonna appeared to be surprised. She was in the kitchen in an apron and a '50s style dress baking fresh bread and gingerbread men like a domestic goddess. The day before she had gone through how the oven worked with the chef."

The cookies may have put her over the top: The London Sun says an "initial report" labeled her "as perfect as Mary Poppins."

After supposedly wowing the child welfare worker with her culinary prowess, she brought him into her memorabilia-packed study for a very personal chat.

"She spoke about her tours, saying she said she will tour once in the next five years then after that no more," relates the insider to the Mail. "She made it very clear that they would tour as a family unit, and the importance of normality in her children's lives."

Madonna also purportedly promised she would return to Malawi twice a year and talked up her stance on the environment and climate change.

(Speaking of which, the Kabbalah devotee may go up a size or two on her carbon footprint thanks to the forthcoming Jewish holidays. Madonna and her brood are reportedly hopping a private jet to celebrate Rosh Hashana in Israel.)

"It is the final legal hurdle in adopting David and they are so relieved it went well," the source tells the Sun. "No wonder they look so happy and have been buying sex toys."

Next: Brit's VMA Flip-Out: 'I Looked Like a Fat Pig!'